I Just Wanted to AFK (#5)

Finding Thieving I could leave alone

The original plan was simple enough: find another decent money maker I could leave alone while I worked. I tested gnomes, Yanille watchmen, archaeologists and a few other targets, trying to balance profit, XP and how long I could stop looking at the game.

The watchmen were funny because a surprising amount of the value came from stealing bread. The archaeologists were a better all-around option for a while, but I kept getting pulled toward faster XP. That eventually led me to dwarf traders, then Goebie scavengers, Menaphos market guards and finally Master Mages.

I started the episode at 100 Thieving and finished at 106. By the end I had several methods I could leave alone for a few minutes, and the slower XP methods lasted even longer when I cared more about money than levels.

The machines finally stopped needing me every day

The Invention machines were already working, but I was still constantly collecting simple parts, buying energy, making divine charges and putting nearly all the money back into the next batch.

This week the loop finally started to feel like the thing I wanted to build. I loaded the machines with roughly eight days of magic logs and enough charge to keep them running for more than a week. At the end of the episode they still had about one week and one hour left.

I still have to buy the supplies, collect the parts, make the charges and sell them, but I don't have to check the machines every day anymore. I can load them up, leave them alone for more than a week and handle the rest of the loop when I have time.

The cash situation was funny because the machines were producing parts faster than I could afford to turn them into charges. I'd sell a batch, feel rich for a few minutes, then spend most of it on magic logs and incandescent energy and become poor again.

Thieving turned into an Invention method too

Getting 100 Thieving let me make the pickpocketing bag, which was my first real SkillVention item. That meant the time I spent pickpocketing could also train Invention in the background.

I eventually reached 82 Invention, made a mechanised siphon and set it up so the bag could be siphoned automatically. It's a small quality-of-life change, but it removes another thing I'd otherwise forget while I'm trying to make the account more AFK.

Archaeology was the detour behind the detour

I wanted the Sticky Fingers relic because faster automatic pickpocketing would make Thieving more profitable. The problem was that my Archaeology level and qualifications were nowhere near ready.

My account was already in the 50s, but I'd barely done the actual Archaeology progression. I had to go back, solve early mysteries, restore artifacts, complete collections, run research and work through the qualification requirements properly.

I unlocked Assistant, started keeping research active and found a more tolerable way to excavate with porters and my Jackalope. I made real progress, but level 84 was still too far away to force into this episode. Sticky Fingers is still a future goal.

The Ardougne diary became the goal I could actually finish

The Ardougne Hard diary gave me a much closer upgrade for the whole Thieving setup, so I put Sticky Fingers aside and started working through the diary requirements.

That turned into a lot of quests. I finished Ardougne Easy and Medium, then worked through Making History, Meeting History, Hand in the Sand, Kennith's Concerns, Enlightened Journey, Tribal Totem, Legends' Quest, Back to My Roots and Catapult Construction, along with the remaining tasks.

I also managed to misunderstand more than one time-gated farming requirement. I planted the wrong papaya tree, spent beans speeding up something that didn't help, and discovered the jade vine needed another wait after it finished growing.

The vine eventually became angry, I killed it, finished Ardougne Hard and picked up the Ardougne cloak 3.

The five-minute Menaphos test

I went back to the Menaphos market guards for one quick test after finishing the diary. Earlier in the episode, I was usually getting around four minutes at best before they caught me.

On this run it took about four minutes for them to notice me, and I kept pickpocketing until they finally stunned me at five minutes. That was exactly the kind of improvement I wanted to see from all of this work.

Between 106 Thieving, Ardougne Hard, Finger Discount rank 1 and a Magpie, my calculator put the guaranteed Menaphos window just under four minutes. It also put archaeologists at roughly six minutes and forty seconds and gnomes at just over seven minutes. I still have the camouflage outfit and Sticky Fingers to finish, so there's room to push all of those further.

Where the account finished

I finished with 68.7M cash after the machine sales, other account progress and all the money I kept putting back into supplies throughout the week.

I also collected about 3.52M in value from eight days of Kingdom, reached 79 Farming while Player-Owned Farm kept moving, improved the Ports crew and got four of the five camouflage outfit pieces.

Next I want to use the money I built up to speed up the remaining upgrades, finish the camouflage outfit and work toward Sticky Fingers. I'm also looking at Darkmeyer because it could open up more Thieving and combat options for the account.

Links and resources

• AFK Thieving calculatorThe calculator I used to compare the pickpocketing windows.
• AFK Money Machine Episode 4The three-machine setup and supply loop this episode builds on.
• Ardougne achievementsThe diary tasks and rewards behind the Ardougne cloak upgrades.
• Sticky FingersThe Archaeology relic I am still working toward for Thieving.
• Mechanised siphonThe Invention device I set up for the pickpocketing bag.